


I Want You To Hurt Me

by AgentCoop, Myka



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Anal Sex, Choking, Consensual Non-Consent, Established Relationship, Goretober 2019, M/M, Masochism, Rope Bondage, Rough Sex, Sadism, Sexual Violence, rope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-12-01 21:04:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20898857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentCoop/pseuds/AgentCoop, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Myka/pseuds/Myka
Summary: Ash comes to Max with a request, and Max is only too happy to help.





	I Want You To Hurt Me

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Day 4 of Goretober: Choking/Hanging
> 
> Please read the tags. Consider yourself warned.

* * *

“I want you to hurt me.”

Max stares at him, unsure of how to process the words. “You want…”

“You to hurt me.” Ash is nodding now, a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth. His cheeks are flushed, but he’s holding Max’s eyes as though this is any normal conversation, as though they’re discussing the weather, or the most recent developments in the news. “I just…” he bites his lower lip.

Max always finds this adorable. He wants to step forward and take Ash in his arms. He wants to press their mouths together, to feel the curve of Ash’s neck under his fingers. 

But he can sense that this is important, that Ash needs something that only he can give.

“I just,” Ash says again. “I want to be able to say no. I want you to hurt me. I don’t want you to hold back, I want you to tie me up, hit me, choke me, _ hurt _ me. Because I trust you, and I can say no to you, and you’ll stop.”

And there it is.

The crux of the thing.

Max knows all too well about Ash’s past. He knows because has told him everything. Every dark memory that marred his heart he told so he wouldn't’ keep it inside anymore. And Max always listened. Always waited patiently for Ash to let go. He couldn't even remember the last time Ash had a nightmare.

He trusts Ash.

Ash trusts him.

Max just isn’t sure he trusts himself.

There’s a swelling of shame then, and Max is the one to tear his eyes away first. 

He can’t ever admit this. He can’t ever say it. It’s something he’s buried so deep within himself that even he can pretend it’s gone, it’s excised, it’s nothing.

“I want you to hurt me, Max.”

The words snap something in Max’s head. It pools directly to his groin.

He wants to hurt Ash.

It’s not about leaving permanent damage, it’s not that he wants Ash to fear him. But the thought of Ash underneath him, gasping for breath...crying in pain...flesh purpling under the weight of Max’s hands...

It turns him on so much he almost can’t breathe.

“Max?”

Max closes his eyes for a moment, grounding himself. Then forces his head back up. “You really...want that? You want...pain?”

Ash nods, the smile growing, the flush in his cheeks blooming brighter. His eyes sparkle now, as though he’s excited, as though he wasn’t expecting this sort of reaction. “Yes. I want to hurt. I want you to make me scream. I want you to scare me. I need it. I need that...it’s just...it’s this...I can’t explain it. It feels like trying to explain it would make me sound crazy. I just know I want it, and then when it gets too much, when I’m too frightened, I want to say no. And then you’ll stop. And it will be…” his eyes flicker up for a second, just past Max to where their dresser stands. There is a mirror, some paperbacks, and a small picture frame that holds a single photograph–Max and Ash in California, standing on the shoreline. “It will be everything,” he whispers.

Max finally closes the distance between them, taking Ash’s hand in his own and bending his head down so that their foreheads touch. “Whatever you want,” he murmurs.

* * *

They don’t prepare for it.

Max knows they should have a conversation, they should go over some rules, there should be some sort of negotiation between them, but Ash continually dodges him on the subject.

The only thing Max knows is that Ash wants to be surprised, Ash wants to be beaten, and Ash wants to be scared.

It sits within him night after night, this pooling desire, this excitement, this electricity. And finally, when he can’t take it anymore, he gets a text message from Ash at work:

_ I’m ready. _

Max knows he still needs to wait a few more days. He needs to let it build between them, he needs to let Ash have time for that anticipation to grow. 

It’s three days later when Ash comes in late from work, his eyes tired, his mouth pressed in a straight line. 

“You okay?” Max calls from the kitchen. He’s pouring a glass of whiskey for himself, and when Ash doesn’t answer, he pours a second. “Here.” 

Ash takes it without really looking at him. “Long day.”

“Mmm.” Max allows him a few moments to rest, to drink, to let the alcohol buzz through his skin. He finishes his own glass quickly, his heartbeat quickening. “Ash,” he murmurs. His voice is loud in his ears, thick and swollen sounding.

“Yeah?”

“Strip.”

Ash looks at him curiously for just a second, and then realization dawns on his features. “Oh,” he says, setting the whiskey glass down with a _ thunk._

“Now.” Max grinds it out, the order loud and authoritative. 

Ash glances at him, he’s too slow, and so Max rounds on him, grabbing him by the shirt front and pushing him violently across the kitchen.

Ash hits the back of one of their dining room chairs and his foot catches in the legs of it, before he tumbles to the floor with a yelp. He tries to sit up, eyes darting from side to side as though his instincts have kicked in and he’s looking for an escape.

Max doesn’t give him one.

He’s followed Ash, clenching his fingers into a fist, then punching, nailing Ash right in the nose. “I said _ now _,” he barks.

Ash is down again, hands up at his face. They come away bloody. “Sorry,” he says, his voice already shaking. “Okay. Okay.” He holds a hand up as though to ward off Max’s blows, then scoots back against the cabinets under the sink, pressing against them to stand. “Can we go upstairs?” he asks, quiet, and unsure.

It’s strange to Max, how quickly Ash goes from confident adult, to cowering child, but Max doesn’t question it. He doesn’t say a word, he just strides forward, grabs Ash by the hair, and pulls him from the kitchen. Ash moves with him, but Max refuses to let go at all until they’re in the bedroom where he throws Ash against the bed as hard as he can. “Strip and get on.”

Ash is shaking now, blood from his nose bright red against his skin, trickling down over his lips. His fingers are hesitant as he works the buttons of his shirt, but he manages to peel it off, to unzip his pants and pull them free as well. Soon he’s completely naked on the bed, the back of his hand bloody as he wipes at his nose. “Is this okay?” he asks.

There’s a single moment where the bottom drops out. Where Max realizes that he’s rock hard in his briefs just watching the bruises starting to darken on Ash’s face. That Ash is splayed out in front of him, at his mercy, but that he’s quiet and still and his own cock lies soft between his legs.

For a moment Max is afraid that he’s fucked everything up and they’ll never go back to the way things were.

Ash saves him, though. “Max,” he calls. “Max, it’s okay. This is good. Please keep going?”

His voice is quavering, his hands are still trembling, but he’s Ash. He’s all Ash, and it’s all Max needs.

There’s rope in the closet. Cuffs too, just in case. Max spent the week preparing to do his worst, and even just the idea of seeing Ash tied up is almost too much for him to take. “Hands above your head,” he orders, and Ash is quick to obey.

Max ties him up. Loops the rope first around each delicate wrist with ease, pulling tight before stringing Ash up to the head of the bed. The rope cuts in dark against Ash’s flesh, already leaving it’s mark. Ash wiggles against the restraints and Max punches him again. “Don’t resist,” he orders.

Ash whines as Max pushes his head against the headboard just below his tied hands and loops another line of rope around his neck, pulling it taught, forcing Ash to lean back so it doesn’t cut off all of his air.

“Now there’s a pretty kitten,” Max groans. He steps back for a minute, admiring Ash’s naked body, then removes his clothes, his dick springing free from his pants.

Ash shakes and tries to pull at the rope, but Max climbs on the bed, slotting himself between Ash’s open legs.

“Can you breathe?” he asks.

Ash nods, but his face is turning red, he’s having trouble getting full breaths in.

Max smiles and reaches for the rope behind Ash, grabbing both ends and pulling it tight. There’s a familiar tightening within his stomach, and Max almost cums as he watches the rope squeeze Ash’s neck and make an indentation into the skin. For a second Ash panics and kicks. Max releases just enough of the rope and watches Ash take a deep breath.

“Perfect,” Max smiles wide. He’s so hard he can’t take it anymore. He gives his own cock a few pumps, moaning in pleasure at the feel of it, before leaning back over Ash.

Ash's wrists burn and bleed where the rope bites his skin. Max can see him struggling to catch his breath, gasping for air. There’s blood dripping down his chin now, and Max knows he’s bitten his tongue. "Please..." Ash manages to wheeze out.

Max slams his fist into Ash’s face, almost knocking him out. He lines up, ignoring the way Ash’s gasps are starting to shudder, ignoring the way tears are pouring down his cheeks. He starts to push in, watching his thick cock disappearing inside Ash’s tight hole. 

"Max please..." Ash cries out.

Max only pulls the rope tighter, watches his dick going deeper.

Ash tries to move back, so Max punches him in the gut. Once. Twice. Three times.

There’s an awful choking sound, and then Ash starts to cough, blood and bile flecking his lips. Max finishes pushing his dick to the hilt, his balls rubbing against the soft blond hair at Ash’s groin. “Always so tight and squeezing me so perfectly,” he groans out.

Ash is gasping, desperate, short breaths of air, and the rope pulls even tighter as he looks at Max. 

“Trouble breathing?” Max touches the bruised belly already becoming red. Pinches Ash’s nipples, then bends down and bites one just to hear Ash scream. “Let me help,” he mouths around the swollen bud.

Max’s pulls on the rope with both hands and watches it tighten around Ash’s neck. Ash’s eyes grow wide, grow terrified. Tears keep falling, soaking the mattress below his head. He starts to kicks against Max, but it’s futile. Max’s body weight is keeping him down. Max just tightens the rope harder and harder, and watches the struggle.

“What does it feel to not be able to breathe?” Max whispers as he kisses Ash’s blue lips. Hears his choked gasps as they become desperate and slower. Watches Ash’s eyes roll up as he starts losing consciousness.

He lets go.

Ash takes a deep desperate breath and Max crushes their lips together hungrily as he starts thrusting into the beaten body. Fucking it as hard as he can.

He keeps his hold on the rope around Ash’s neck, just enough that Ash can get in a few quick struggling breaths. Ash’s insides tighten around his cock every time he pulls it tight and he’s so close. He’s right there. Ash is kicking at him again and with a groan, Max cums deep inside Ash’s struggling form.

For a moment Max can’t think. He pulls the rope tighter still then— 

“Stop,” Ash whimpers against him. “Stop. Stop, stop, stop—”

Max let’s go of the rope immediately, quickly reaching for Ash’s wrists and untying them as well. The rope has cut deep into the pale flesh of his wrists, leaving blooming bruises and jagged cuts in it’s wake. Ash’s neck is just as marred. There is a deep dark angry line around it, that will be difficult to hide in the days to come. Max brushes a hand against Ash’s face and wipes at the tears still fresh on his cheeks. “I love you,” he says.

Ash tilts his head up and presses his lips to Max’s, his teeth latch into Max’s lower lip and he bites down hard. Blood drips down Max’s chin as he smiles down. “The little lynx bites,” Max grins, entirely satisfied.

Ash smirks back. “So does the wolf.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find us on Twitter:  
[Agentcoop](twitter.com/agentcoop1)  
[Myka](https://twitter.com/mykafl)


End file.
